Essential 9 Connection

Essential 9

Connection

Build a strong rapport with your customer, client and or audience and if you don’t, they might look at you with a face you make when you hear a credit card salesperson call you.

Part of that riveting quality of a charismatic speaker comes from the relationship created with the audience. You have to create that environment of comfort, conducive for your audience to receive and take in what you are speaking. It should be such that you’ve created in him or her; a sponge like state where what you say is all soaked in. This relationship is important for you to yield successful results.

Part of that connection is created by what you say. And again what you say and how you time it, are what really creates a working relationship; you need to sense the direction your customer wants to be taken towards. If your customer is in the mood for some nice hot chocolate and you start suggesting smoothies or shakes. You’re going to be in trouble right from the start. Well if that is your intent you must first give in to his expression and then curve the conversation towards where you want to lead the conversation to. But immediately pitching what you want to get across is not going to win you a connection you came there for but a big NO to whatever you genuinely might want to help the customer with. You never connected and there’s no strings attaching you; you cannot possibly envisage a pull.

Connection is building on what is similar between you and your customer, client and or audience. What is it that drives them to be connected? What is that cue they are looking for when you speak to them? What is that story or event or incident that brings you closer to your customer? What is that product or concept or idea that you both can connect with? Connection is the key to stay bound with your customer as that will help further the relationship and the opportunities that present itself along the way.  

A lot of it is created with your eyes, motions, and emotions. Eye contact is an absolute must. You cannot be looking London and speaking towards Tokyo. You will not be able to build or create a connection with this approach. Focus on your customer as he’s the most important reason at the point and he needs your every attention verbally and non-verbally. Look into his eyes and speak. Don’t stare into his eyes; staring might alarm him wrongly and he might start feeling uncomfortable and this is a situation you do not want to create.     

For a large audience, Move around and use your hands. A great technique is to actually move into the audience periodically. Don’t hide behind a podium or table. You don’t want to look like a class teacher or priest at the podium lecturing away and in the process putting half your audience to sleep. It has to be interactive, you must create that environment for exchange of expression; you must read the non-verbal cues from your customer or your audiences as you speak with them. They speak to you all the time and great speakers always speak back. They learn and pick up on this communication and immediately with meticulous spontaneity speak what the customer wants to hear.

With a smaller audience, even an audience of one, be careful not to look down throughout your presentation. Meet your prospect’s gaze from time to time. Use your hands, lean forward, come close (but not uncomfortably close). You don’t want to be falling over your customer or your audience, a respectable distance is what is needed to be maintained so that you understand your position and you customer and or audience feels comfortable in his space.

Remember: connection is what holds you on to your network and if you do not establish this you will end up free falling in all directions.

David C Linus
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Principal Trainer and CEO
ICSPS (Institute for Communication Skills and Public Speaking)
david@icspsindia.com| www.icspsindia.com
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